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JM: Young tilted head closeup

cyndrarae

Rebelling against Reality since 2003

v14.0


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JM: Young tilted head closeup
cyndrarae

Upset ranting and a question. Actually, several...

I have a request for you guys..

Since you were kind enough to friend me, I assume you have been reading the stuff I write yeah? So I guess you would be the best people to answer this question. Umm... okay see there is this author (who shall forever remain unnamed) that I used to like. And now I don't anymore, because I just realized that all her writing,  ALL of her fifty something series are exactly the same - DEPRESSING.

And dark and hopeless. She keeps breaking the characters down, puts them through so much angst and torture until there is nothing left. And then she does it some more. Even the sex isn't hot, it's just kinda... sad. Dubious consent at best. And I have a point I swear. Okay, let me try again.

See this author... the way she writes is so riveting and so bloody... GOOD that... I can't help but get emotionally involved. I start to relate more than I want to. But the thing is, the plot - the characters' circumstances just keep getting worse and worse and it doesn't get better, ever. Even at the end when the big bad is defeated and it's time to start healing and stuff, it's like... she doesn't really want to go there, where things are getting better. She touches upon them like briefly then shies away to a new torture series. The bad parts are graphic and excruciatingly detailed. And I wonder why she writes the way she does. Every writer has demons of his or her own that they're trying to exorcise through this creative outlet.

I feel for her, I really do. But I cannot put myself through this again.

I cannot, will not read her ever again because she just brings me down so horribly. I keep thinking about it and fret about it and smoke a couple more than my usual limit for the day and sometimes, when I'm three or more glasses of wine down like now, I start to cry and have to literally smack myself in the forehead to remind me that it's not real. That it's only fiction.

Yeah, that's how good she is. So.. I'm done with her. Which brings me back to my original reason for this post.

Now I write a considerable amount of angst myself right. And clearly it is a level of pathos I am personally comfortable with, just like the writer mentioned above is comfortable with hers. But what do YOU guys as READERS think? Have I written something, anything so far that has brought you down? Upset you somehow? Made you feel like - "Dude, this is way too painful for me." ? Or "Dude, what is this girl's childhood trauma??" Or "Okay. Reading that one was a mistake." ???

Because, I don't think I want to be that kind of writer that makes people sad. I want to write happy stuff, optimistic stuff. Altho realistically speaking, I suck at fluff. But the least I can do is... write something hopeful you know. And not offload my personal demons onto my readers. I just don't want to do that.

So... umm... I need to know what you guys think? And if there is a piece of my writing that upsets you?

I probably won't take it down for the sake of maintaining my archive to show progress made (bleh if any!) through the years. But it would really help me understand myself and my writing a little more. This is not an attempt to go professional in any way haha. My stupid job and my husband and my dog keep me busy plenty enough thank you. I just... I'm curious you know?

Is there any reason for why we write angst in the first place? And why do we even read it?? What the fuck do we get out of these sad, tragic stories????

........


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I know exactly what you mean, and I won't read that any more either. To me your work does not qualify. I don't mind a story that ends on a really depressing note, if it is fitting and the story is relatively short. However, if I am going through all the emotional tearing down of a long torture fic, I want the corresponding build-up of healing. I actually prefer this phase. If the author is going to gloss over the healing phase, I feel cheated. As for why I read angst - sometimes I need a good cry. I have mostly trained myself not to cry for things about my life. However, when I read angst, I can sit alone in front of a computer and cry for other people. Oddly this actually makes me feel better.

I don't mind a story that ends on a really depressing note, if it is fitting and the story is relatively short. However, if I am going through all the emotional tearing down of a long torture fic, I want the corresponding build-up of healing. I actually prefer this phase. If the author is going to gloss over the healing phase, I feel cheated.

Completely agree with every single word you said hon. It's what really brought me down with the.. other author's work that I read yesterday. I felt cheated.

I have mostly trained myself not to cry for things about my life. However, when I read angst, I can sit alone in front of a computer and cry for other people. Oddly this actually makes me feel better.

So true. I always think crying about my issues is overrated, it is not cathartic, I don't feel better after it, it just does NOT help me period. But reading about someone else, empathizing with their pain and maybe even crying a little for them, distracts me enough to forget about my own. And I think that feels good.

You and I have a lot in common hon. Thanks for talking to me :)

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