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cyndrarae

Rebelling against Reality since 2003

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JM: Young tilted head closeup
cyndrarae

XMen: Raven's Gratitude (Logan/Scott)

Title: Raven’s Gratitude
Author’s notes: Movieverse post-X2. Slash, obviously. Writing out and out smut after a very long time, writing X-Men after a very long time… a year I guess. Please be kind and review.
Summary: The X-Men receive a distress call from someone quite unexpected.


***Raven***

They call him the Beast… I wonder why.

Tall, undark, handsome man of such impeccable manners… his touch is gentle, almost apologetic. Large, warm hands I find myself not flinching away from. I let him sew up the six inch gash on my right arm just above the elbow, and idly ponder why is it the good doctor’s having trouble looking me in the eye.

“It's okay doc, you’re not the first one. You won't be the last.”

He pauses, looks my way in adorable confusion. “Pardon me?”

“My blue skin and the golden-ish scales? Everyone who’s ever laid eyes on me has been either extremely repulsed, or unbelievably turned on.”

I lean in closer. “And I get a feeling you may not be so easy to disgust.”

I smile at his discomfort, his giant adam’s apple bobbing nervously. He goes back to working the needle through my arm. But I’m not done amusing myself yet.

“You don’t get out much do you? Could use a bit of sun.”

Now he blushes, sighs. “I understand you wish to distract yourself from the pain Miss Darkholme but… please find something else to exercise your exceptional powers of observation on.”

My grin’s wider. “When was the last time you were this close to a beautiful, near-naked lady Dr. McCoy?”

Ruffled, peers up at me through scrunched up bespectacled eyes. “I *am* a physician you know. At least… for now.”

And he goes back to work, losing himself in thoughts I can probably guess, hell I have a pretty damn good idea.

Henry McCoy. Followed up a medical degree with a post-doctorate in biochemistry. Brilliant genetic research scientist like him having to double up as GP for Xavier’s bratpack… all because of the recent, sudden demise of the original doctor… Jean Grey. Heir apparent to Xavier’s unchartered powers of telepathy and telekinetism. Or at least she was, once.

The prodigal girlfriend.

I turn my strained neck towards the cabin next door, separated only by a sheet of glass so I can see the bed across me clearly. On it the man who saved my neck tonight (no shit), ass-kicked the fucking Friends of fucking Humanity and got me out. And here he is now, bruised and beat… his severe features finally relaxed under the influence of heavy sedation. Scott Summers.

The prodigal son.

The X-Men had no sane reason whatsoever to help someone like me. None. I’ve only tried killing, maiming, blowing them up, stealing their students and generally being a total bitch to them like… a couple of hundred times. Maybe they felt obligated to return the favor for three months ago. Hey, way I see it, Stryker was a common enemy, and that one-time only collaborative effort had become absolutely necessary to cut him down. And Erik really likes Xavier, they go *way* back and he talks about him all the time. Unfortunately, he also says the Professor never progressed with changing times… that he is too good for his *own* good. And that of all mutants worldwide.

Hey, whatever. I am just glad he responded when he did. I am grateful these men, Summers and Logan arrived when they did. They risked their lives for me… they didn’t have to.

“There. All done.”

The doctor starts to clean up around me, and I’m free to go. But he still wouldn’t look at me.
Jeez. The beast can wait. I jump off the table but can't pull my eyes away from the unconscious man beside. Tomorrow when Erik comes to get me, we’ll be back on opposite sides of the fence again. Opposite sides of the war… with all its brutal hostilities… when owing a debt of gratitude to the enemy can't possibly be good can it?

No. Scores must be settled somehow. Tonight.

Hey, a girl can try.


***Logan***

I can't sleep.

Ro would explain it away with something about post mission adrenaline high and shit. That may be true for her and the rest of the bunch but not me. Guess I’m just too old for that. Good aggression relievers sure, but fact is every mission just leaves me exhausted, wary. Guilt… for walking away unscratched when everyone else comes back mauled by varying degrees of severity. Slim’s down in the sick bay tonight. Three broken ribs and a concussion. Significant internal bleeding.

He hates it there, I know. The whole fucking sublevel 3 still smells of her. That was her lab, her own sanctuary. Hank works there now, besides looking after the medical needs of the school which we have no shortage of. Its tough, seeing Cyke struggle to make polite conversation with the new doctor. Quietly relenting to stay overnight for observation at the bay when it’s the last place he’d ever wanna be.

After his bedroom of course.

Which is where I find myself right now. Its three am and I’ve been walking about the mansion for three hours now.

I stop at his door, know the room’s empty but I don’t go in. It is… was… their private space and while the kid can't bring himself to sleep in there, he still treasures the room and all its memories like anything. He won't be happy if he knew that *I*, of all people, had been in there.

Yeah, I’ve been watching him. Ever since.

I see him keeping it together by day, all brave and stoic and seemingly unaffected. And I hear him pacing, shaking, trying not to but crying by night… every night. Sometimes he helps himself to a whole lot of Jack Daniels to induce sleep, but only when he’s got no classes or commitments the next day. I watch him, pick up after him on the rare occasions he’s forgetful or hung over or just too lost in his morbid past. But I don’t approach him. Don’t try to talk or any such shit. We’re not friends. We’re barely colleagues. We just happen to co-exist.

I respect his strength and courage but I dislike his stubborn refusal to ask for help. Although you know, I probably would have been just as stubborn if… if I was him… if I’d loved Jeannie as much as he did, and still does. I didn’t, I know that now. Or maybe I just moved on soon enough, something the kid’s finding damn near impossible to do.

It probably started that way… I was intrigued by the way he’d been *not* dealing with Jean’s death. Intrigue turned to concern then until eventually… imagine my surprise when one day I realized I actually *cared* for someone besides Marie.

I knew he was beautiful the moment I saw him, heck its probably why I hated him so much back then. But these days… his natural charms, the litheness of his body, the freshness of his cologne, his very presence is starting to affect me in ways I… I’d never expected. Specially so soon after… her. All my thoughts are of him. And I’ve stopped bothering to deny them or analyse them either. How does it matter anyway. They’re just thoughts, and that’s all they’re ever gonna be.

I turn a corner heading towards the Danger Room. Walking past the swimming pool is the first time I hear it… a faint rustle from behind, like someone on feather-light footfalls, silently following me around.
The thing about this part of the mansion… everythin’s glass. Even the ceiling and the walls… the blue water looks amazing shimmering in the full moon light from above. Guess I’m not too bothered, its probably one of the girls from class. Kids these days. Sadly, confrontation is inevitable now because when I spin around, for whoever’s stalkin me… there will be no place left to hide.

I turn then. And I don’t believe what… rather who I see.

“Scott?”

Holy shit.

I frown and stare at the elegant figure before me without inhibition. Scott stands barely five yards away, leaning his left side against the glass gym wall… arms folded before him as also one leg crossing the other. He is dressed in clean white sweats, the ones from the sick bay… sleeveless tank top that allows a sneak view of his belly button and shapely cotton bottoms hanging low on his slim waist. With his current posture, the said slim waist is pushed out a bit to the right, exposing more skin. Holy holy shit. When my eyes finally travel back to his face, I see he is wearing his sleeping goggles. And a soft smile I swear I have never *ever* seen on him before.

I sniff the air, yep… there was Scott alright. But there was also another scent, stronger… foreign and yet familiar. Oh fuck.

I growl, seething.

“What do you think you’re doing?”


***Raven***

What can I say. I notice these things.

I saw the looks Logan sent the kid’s way… saw how worried he was for him. Doesn’t take a genius to figure the big bad Wolverine has fallen for Cyclops and hard.

Scott’s a good-looking guy… in a classical, thoroughly conventional sorta way really. Not my type, but the way Logan’s looking at me its clear he approves with all his heart… alongwith other organs. Strange this… absurd, unequal mix of consciousness and vanity, hesitation and pride… Logan would never look at Mystique like that. God I can't be blushing can I?

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Kay he’s figured me out now. Which I expected, the Wolverine can sniff you out in seconds. I push myself off the wall I was leaning against, take a small step towards my intended target.

“Returning the favor.”

My voice… Scott’s voice… is deep, impassioned… made soft through my own feminine cadence. The mourning leader’s tone so besmirched with desire, and lust… takes the Wolverine aback. Like… *way* aback.

Logan’s eyes grow wide with suspicion… and wonder. I tread closer. I am aware of the still womanly gait to my movements but I can't just discard it on such short notice you know. Its obvious though, Logan isn’t complaining, studying every move I make with great… fascination.

“And how do you propose to do that?”

I smirk. He wants to hear me say it, so be it.

“On the plane… when I almost tripped and fell… you made to catch me… but didn’t.”

He whispers hoarsely. “I didn’t have to.”

“I saw how you worried you were. You care. So much.”

He swallows, but stands his ground. I come closer, emboldened.

“I can see it in your eyes Logan. You want me. You want me so bad, it hurts. Doesn’t it?”

Logan holds his breath. I stand barely a feet away… in the shimmering light its plain to see how he trembles. Struggling to retain control.

“Scott wouldn’t let you hold him then. But you can hold me now.”

I realize my own voice is trembling too. Another small step, and I’m so close… I can feel his ragged breaths in my short brown hair. I rose two inches to become Scott but Logan towers over me still. Strong arms so close and yet so far… the solid breadth of his chest I want so desperately to collapse into but I wait. I must wait.

“Hold me Logan.”

I step closer, so we’re both chest to chest… no space between us. My face turned up, lips licked wet… quivering in anticipation.

I couldn’t have picked a better spot.

The mansion’s farthest wing, undisturbed by sneaky little brats or overprotective guardians at this hour of the morning. All is quiet… except the soft ripples in the water and the wind fluttering in the trees outside. A cool draft blows in from a window left open somewhere. Amid the night shadows there is enough moon light to mark each line, every furrow on this handsome man’s face… enough to shine in his mysterious brown eyes. Sending my pulse racing and damn me if I forget who I’m supposed to be right now. I haven’t, I can't… Logan’s eyes pierce me through and through. I remember enough to remember he wouldn’t spare me a second glance otherwise.

And its this intense gaze that has me convinced… Logan turned me down once, but he won't tonight. Tonight… I am the temptation he can't resist.

I am the poison he simply won't deny.

Lord knows what struggles rage within his heart, he continues to stare at me… with such longing and desperation… but refuses to act on it.

“Logan, please…”

Something flickers in his eyes, behold my success. It’s the pleading, has to be the pleading. I want to smile but fear that might put him off. Instead, I reach out for his left hand, interlocking his fingers in mine… waiting for him to strengthen his grip, and he does.

Strike two.

I can't help but smile. And thankfully it doesn’t send him scurrying away. I rise on the tips of my toes… press my lips to his right ear lobe, then slowly move them down his jawline to stop just on the corner of his mouth. Nuzzle his cheek for a whole minute before I part to look into his still guarded eyes. That’s when I feel his other arm going around my waist… his hand flat on my back, that’s starting to move… in the softest caress of my life.

We kiss.

Who knew the big bad wolf could kiss like this? He is gentle but firm, generous yet insistent… and slowly but surely losing patience like men usually do. The kiss starts off leisurely but soon as I give in, he dives into my mouth with all his passion suppressed for who knows how long. Tongues duel and he holds my face in both his hands for greater leverage. Its luxuriant, comfortable… the incessant pressure of his tongue over mine, his eagerness to explore and conquer until we’re both breathless and separating to gasp for some fucking air. I don’t waste any moment though, latch onto his throat… sucking and nipping everywhere I reach. His arms encircle me completely, one hand in the small of my back inching its way down… another in my hair stroking, loving the touch of silk to his rough calloused skin. Gripping the same hair, he pulls me away from his throat just when I was really getting into it. I look up to find a question in his eyes.

“Tell me what you want Logan.”

I whisper, with a breathless smile. Can't seem to carry my own weight anymore, lean into his bigger frame and rest my head thrown back into his hand.

A hundred, no, thousand thoughts I see fleeting across his face, a thousand dreams and fantasies fill his eyes he wishes to live in this one night alone. I wonder what the man may have in store for me… and in that moment, pellets of fear and anxiety start to gather in the pit of my stomach. What have I offered myself up to?

Wolverine smiles.


***Logan***

Like I said, I will not even try to deny it. This is Mystique, I know and she can't be trusted either, I know. But… goddamnit its *Scott* I’m holding in my arms! A Scott who wouldn’t look away when I glance at him. A Scott who wouldn’t shirk me off if I tried to touch him. A Scott to whom I could mean more than just another guy on the team… if only for a few hours. A Scott who, for one night… just this one night, would be mine. All mine.

This is a temptation I can't resist, hell I don’t want to. Believe me I tried, but I won't anymore.

“Tell me what you want Logan.”

She whispers… *He* whispers… smiling that coy little smile I always knew Scott would be capable of. Red lips turned up in a pout I desperately want to kiss, but first… there is a greater, much greater need I have to fulfill right now.

The time I took to contemplate my desires, apparently was long enough for… for Scott to start getting anxious. I can smell the beginnings of mild fear radiating off the sensual body in my arms, feel the slight squirming as he becomes conscious of the growing bulge in my pants. Jeez, I smile.

“Relax. I’m not gonna hurt ya.”

He sighs, quits his squirming… but not the worrying. I bend forward and capture his lips once again, slowly sinking into the blissful cavern of his lovely mouth. I could kiss him like this all night. When we part next to breathe, I know exactly what I need.

“Take off your glasses.”

If he’d been worried before, he isn’t anymore. The smile with a thousand meanings comes back to his perfect face again. I wound both my arms around his narrow waist, the top riding up so I can touch the hot bare flesh beneath. Just as breathtaking as I’d imagined it would be. My Scott.

Slowly he raises a hand and pulls off the intruding glasses off his face. Keeps his eyes closed and drops the glasses to the floor with a clang. I inhale deeply.

“Blue. Got to be blue.”

My voice nothing more than a hoarse whisper, jeez I’m getting harder by the minute just looking at the kid’s un-spectacled face. The perfect high cheekbones… the swollen red lips… and then he opens his eyes.

“My God.”

I hold my breath for what seems like eons. Deep, oceanic blue… encircled in long, curled eyelashes. Eyes so deep I could lose myself in them forever. Very next instant I remind myself that its not Scott’s soul I would be drowning myself in. But I don’t care, doesn’t matter… not right now. This is My Scott, this is the man I wanted to hold, and kiss and fuck for so damn long.

I am so fucking hard.

“I’ve waited so long for this.”

He says, and I have no doubt Mystique truly means it. Before I can question or react, Scott slips through my arms and slides down the length of my body… dropping to his knees. Oh my God. I haven’t called for God so often in the last fifteen years of my life. And while I’ve been in this situation very many times, I can't remember feeling such an intense rush of anticipation ever before.

He nuzzles at the front of my jeans and looks up to grin at me like an imp. Little tease. I set my feet apart as he unzips and pushes my boxers out of the way, dragging my already stiff organ out in his hands. I bury my hands in his hair, tugging at them… anchoring myself. He kisses the tip of my length first and slowly, inch by inch takes me into his delicious mouth until I’m engulfed in hot silken moisture.

“God damn.”

I swear repeatedly as he starts pulling as deeply as he possibly can, swirling his tongue over the head, driving me crazy. I am entranced, by the sight of Scott Summers on his knees before me… giving me a fucking great blow job. His beautiful mouth hollowing out and puffing in alternately… till I can take no more. I don’t know if I give enough signs but it doesn’t seem to matter because when I let go, Scott swallows every opalescent drop hungrily and looks up at me with the coyness once again shining in his eyes and that crazy grin. I can't help but chuckle back through the pleasure-filled haze I just lost myself in.
Scott kisses my length once again and I have to physically pull him up by his arms to stop from having another go at it. He is smart enough to know the speeds at which I recover apply to my stamina in sex as well.

“Ah!” Scott winces, as I pull him up and I let go at once.

“Scott, what is it?”

He pants in pain, holds his right arm just above the elbow with his left hand. Damn, I forgot Mystique was hurt.

I gather the boy into my arms again, hugging him tight, so tight to myself but careful not to antagonize the wound anymore. I don’t know who it is I am trying to comfort… Raven for her terrifying ordeal tonight, or Scott for getting hurt… or maybe myself for being so fucking scared that I’d lost him forever.

“It's okay. Logan, I’m okay.”

I ease my grip on the waiflike frame in my arms. Damn, my mind’s all fucked up again. Is this right? Using Mystique to live out my own fantasies of Scott… despite the fact she came to me… *she* offered herself up to me. No. This isn’t right. God… I don’t know what I am doing anymore. I should get away. I should let go for him… her. I should.

I can't.


***Raven***

Logan lets go of me abruptly, zipping himself back up. He stands there watching me… torn between wanting to bail and grabbing me again. Damn, all I had to do was bite down on the stupid scream. Now he’s broken himself out of his own fantasy and sees me for who I really am. And he can't go on anymore.

Shit.

Alright so, yeah… I… started to enjoy myself a bit too much there. And damnit I don’t want it to stop now. This is Logan after all people! I have to do something.

“You scare easy big boy. I was just playing with you.”

I smile, the smile I know is driving him totally bonkers. And he’s hooked, can't stop staring. I slide up closer to him once again, touching every gorgeous part of his torso with every part of mine.

“Pain… is the very first threshold on the way to pleasure. You know that.”

I hiss, into his ear… blowing on the lobe, and he stiffens. “Hurt me all you want Wolvie… I won't break, promise.”

That elicits a massive shudder from the man.

Yes.

I love this… the feel of his strength, his solid structure against me. I lick at his ear again and again, wounding my arms round his neck so it’d be damn hard for him to shrug me off. But he’s not going to. Not anymore. He sighs in defeat.

“What’re you doin to me?”

Arms come back up around me, thank God. I press in closer to him, feeling his rising bulge again. The feel of my own steadily growing erection is new but not entirely unknown (I’ve played this game before you know). And when I withdraw a little to look into his face, I see serious intent there to do something about it.

With a suddenness only a feral can pull off, he whirls me around and grabs me by the waist again… holding me close, my back pressed up against his front. I grind my little rear into his groin and he grinds back. Growls in my ear.

“This what you want kid?”

I gasp. “Yes. God Yes!”

He uses one hand to hold both my wrists in front of my abdomen, the other he presses into the very middle of my spine.  And he pushes.


***Logan***

“L-Logan…”

My Scott… so out of control and whimpering… turns me on more than anything. I caress and squeeze his exquisite ass cheeks while pushing myself into the crevice in between. And he grinds right back moaning in perfect harmony.

“Please… don’t make me wait.”

I hold his wrists in front and he pretends to struggle knowing all too well I’m not about to let go. I’ve seen this lean, lithe body in action during trainings and missions… lets see what he can do for me tonight. I press my free hand in the middle of his spine, pushing him downwards. And he goes with it, his upper torso bending at an acute 45 degrees just ‘cause I say so… his lovely bottom still resting against my stiffening erection.

I push up the tank top from his back, revealing golden skin too tantalizing to resist. I bend to lick at the protrusions of his vertebrae… lick and nip and suck.

“Fuck. Logan, please…”

It’d be so damn easy to take him right here, right now… all I gotta do is push myself in… but to my own amazment, I don’t want it to end so soon. I want this to last, for as long as I can draw it out. I want to remember this for the rest of my fucking life.

Releasing his wrists, and supporting him from the middle, I raise the boy back up… encasing him in my arms from behind, kissing the top of his head. Scott quivers with pleasure, and frustration.

“Shh…”

I turn him around and he wonders whatever am I upto now. I smile, my shit-eating grin nowhere as powerful as his though.

“We’re not doing this here.”

“Where?”

My room. But I don’t tell him that. And I can't resist reaching out for him and heaving him up into my arms. Scott lets out the most adorable little squawk and gives me a wide-eyed scowl.

“What are you doing?”

I press him closer to my chest as he wounds his arms around my neck driven by instincts of sheer self-preservation.

One arm under his knees and another round his waist, I start to walk towards the privacy of my room. Its almost three thirty and this kid in ninth grade comes to practice his swimming at four am sharp every morning. Well I intend to take longer than thirty minutes with My Scott.

Subconsciously I’m aware My Scott doesn’t weigh as much as he ought to. Mystique probably can't increase her body weight I guess but I don’t dwell on it.

On our way, Scott stops fretting about my intentions and amuses himself with nibbling at my ear again. Earlobes - clearly an obsession with the boy. All my attempts to shirk him off only cause him to chuckle and tease me some more.

“You’re so going to pay for this kid.”

My threat is greeted with more grinning and nibbling. “I can't wait.”

I push open the door with a flank and carry my precious cargo inside. Close the door and walk to the bed. He braces himself to be dumped onto it but I don’t. I place him in the middle gently, and he pulls me right on top of him. His laughter rings out in my otherwise silent, barren room. Sparkling blue eyes. Damn they’re beautiful.

“So I’m the fucking bride now?”

He asks, pouting adorably.

I chuckle. “You can be anything you want kid. Anything you need.”

He sighs, pulls me into a deep kiss. “I need you Logan. Inside me. Now.”

And we kiss again.

I pull him up into a half-seated position, grab his top and pull it off him… then my shirt follows it to the floor and we fall back onto the bed again. We just can't get enough of each other’s mouths. I caress the bare expanse of his throat… reach the dark nubs on his flat chest and roll them around in my fingers. He starts to moan and arch into my hand and mouth, breathless with the ruthless teasing. I let my hands roam further until I reach the navel and realize the kid is fucking sensitive down there.

I pull away from the kiss and make my way down there.

“Oh God, oh fuck.”

He swears… so weird hearing Scott Summers swear like that… not like it isn’t weird enough seeing him writhe and moan like a bitch in heat. God how I love the sight of him.

“Told ya I was gonna make you pay.”

And I dive into his belly button once again while he laughs, cries, moans in wrestled out pleasure.

“Logan!”

He can't help but groan when I push the sweats off his hips, wrenching them off his long legs and flinging it across the room. He wears no underwear… and I settle in between his thighs and study him in his entirety. God he’s so… so beautiful. Perfectly pink, perfectly veined erection. A sprinkle of hair but not enough to shroud the gorgeous privates and without intent, I find myself pulling his legs apart, admiring every bit of him as if he were a work of art in a fucking museum and I had all the fucking time in the world.

“L-Logan… come on man.”

Oh shit yeah, I chuckle and he laughs back, breathless in anticipation.

When was the last time I gave someone a blowjob? Not in a long long time I can tell you that. It was always the same… a dark alley, back of a truck, seedy motels or bar restrooms. Some guy, I wouldn’t bother to ask his name, on his knees or against the wall… and I would get my rocks off and leave. Never went beyond it, never wanted it to.

But tonight’s different. Tonight’s Scott… or at least a semblance of him. And I’m gonna take anything I can get right now.

I take his good length into my mouth and he trembles, arches up and I hold his hips down. Serious danger of gag reflex kicking in since I don’t know if I can do it at all. This is hard enough without Scott thrusting in and out as well. At last I go in as deep as possible and feel his organ quivering inside my mouth. Then I start to suck.

“Oh fuck! Oh shit!”

The kid’s verbose alright. I do the same swirling thing he did to me and the effects are magnanimous. Scott writhes and arches right back up into my mouth, but I don’t stop him anymore. I encircle the base with a thumb and forefinger and twist it gently.

“Yikes! Damn it you’re killing me Logan!”

I chuckle, with his length still in my mouth and I swear that wasn’t intentional. The humming around his shaft drives him out of his fucking mind and he moans so loud I fear the whole mansion would come running to my door.

He’s tugging at my hair now. Indication he’s about to come? Before I can process it further, Scott ejaculates and I take it all in my mouth. Sputter a bit but don’t let it on, besides the kid’s too busy panting and quaking to notice.

I clean off every last drop but can't stop kissing his shaft and rubbing the scrotum lovingly in my hands. Scott looks at me, brilliant blue eyes blinking his gratitude, and pleading with me to let him be.

“Stop Logan…”

So damn sensitive right after, yeah guess most guys are. I stretch out to reach and kiss his mouth deeply and lovingly once again, giving him a taste of himself… swallowing his moans.

“You’re not gonna fall asleep are you love?”

He snorts lightly and shakes his head, out of breath. I drop my head back to his navel, laving it gently until I feel his pulse quickening again. I reach out for the dresser beside the bed, have a moisturizer in there somewhere. When I turn back to him, he puts a hand to the side of my face.

“I want to see you when we do this Logan…”

Which is what I had in mind myself. I nod assuringly, kiss him again… devouring is more like it. Joined at the lips, I pull his right leg up over my shoulder. Wetting my fingers, I seek out the cleft of his ass and gently work one finger inside of him.

Scott throws his head back and I suck at the base of his throat instead. He is so tight, as if uninitiated and I wonder if the real Scott had ever… don’t start, I tell myself, and concentrate on the pistoning of Scott’s opening beneath.

Using more gel, I insert another finger into him and dig in deeper. I find the sensitive gland inside and bother it, elicitating the perfect scream from my beautiful partner.

“Hurry… please…”

“Shh… all in good time babe.”

Again and again, I work his tender spot and soon with three fingers stretch him enough to be able to take me in. When I think he’s ready, I unzip myself and lubricate the length of my rock hard manhood.

I wish Scott wouldn’t close those sexy eyes of his, and I tell him that. “Look at me Scott, look at me when I enter you.”

Just as he opens his eyes, I push into him with a single sound thrust… sheathing myself inside of him in one go. His mouth flies open with the sudden taking and he gasps.

“You okay?”

I stroke his belly lovingly, hoping I didn’t hurt him. He manages a smile, that glorious smile all for me.

“Yeah. In a minute…”

And sure enough, once he gets used to the presence of my length inside him, he settles down. He puts his left leg over my shoulder as well for better access, adjusting me inside him. And nods.
I start to move. And he thrusts back. The feel of him, so tight and hot and throbbing all around me… its amazing and I can barely hold myself from coming right away. I angle myself and push in. Bull’s eye.

“Good fucking God! Logan…”

And I continue to thrust in just like that and pull out twice, thrice, four times… I lose count. He grips my arms as I support myself on my hands flat beside him, his fingernails ripping into my flesh. I balance us on one hand and with another take hold of his rejuvenated erection. Just when I thought he couldn’t possibly get any louder, he does.

I pump him in rhythm to the thrusting and before we know it, he is coming all over my stomach and I flood his insides with my second release tonight.

Sated, he puts his legs down and I collapse over him. My breathing is back under control way before his. I caress his sweat-drenched hair and kiss the closed eyelids.

“You okay?”

He smiles, though keeps his eyes closed.

“Okay? I’m great. I’m more than… fucking okay!”

And when he opens his eyes, I can't help but kiss him again. Not as intense since he’s out of breath already. I fall back to his side on the bed, gently slipping out of him… gather him into my arms and hold him there. Run fingers through his lustrous hair. He lets me, resting bonelessly where I place him, trusting… basking in the proverbial afterglow.

Seconds turn to minutes… Minutes to over an hour.

“Thank you.” I utter softly.

Mystique looks up then, blue eyes still gleaming with contentment. The smile still sucker punches me in the gut.

“The feeling’s totally mutual, my love.”

She sighs, buries her face back in the crook of my neck… and I continue to hold this body of the man I’ve grown to love. The man who’s still down at the sick bay, unconscious… unaware of how he’s changed my life tonight. For good.

“Raven…”

“Hmm?”

“You… why do you smell like him?”

My morbid curiosity couldn’t just let it be. Though at some level, I think I already knew the answer to that.

Scott looks up at me. Beautiful blue eyes.

“I went to him.”

I swallow. Hard. I shouldn’t have brought it up. But now that I have…

“To return the favor?”

If she notices my voice dripping with bitterness and sarcasm, which I’m dead sure it is… she doesn’t let it on. Shifts, though barely to put some distance between our bodies… looks me in the eye, and that is enough.

I can only sigh. I zip up and turn away to lie flat on my back, one hand under my head, other reaching out to grab a cigar from the drawer and light it.

Through the first cloud of smoke, I turn back to him… her.

“Who?”

I need to hear it. I need to return to reality.

Raven studies me a while, knowing very well I don’t really need her to confirm what I already knew. She decides not to entertain my self-torturing streak any longer than necessary.

“I think you know.”

I look away. I have no right to feel like this… feel *betrayed*. But I do. My Scott sits up on the bed, looking at me with a blank, open expression.

“Do you want me to leave?”

Fucking hell. Scott, stark naked Scott… almost pleading with me again. Mystique sure knows how best to rile me up. I take another long drag from the cigar, then stub it on the floor.

“No.”

He hesitates… wondering if I meant it… and then smiles, damn him… burying himself into me again. You give in to temptation once, its hard to resist it again. I can't help longing for something I can never have. But I aint dumb enough to turn away what I can.

“Never leave… never.”


***Flashback – Raven***

Ten pm. I refused to be sedated earlier, and I can't sleep. So I toss and turn on the hard bed in the sick bay.
Hank did suggest a guest room somewhere on the ground floor but I offered to stay and watch Scott for him instead. Dr. McCoy looked at me like he was talking to a ghost or something.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah doc, I can't sleep anyway. Please go back to your research or whatever it is you were doing. I’ll stay and watch Scott and call you if he needs something.”

He was still suspicious, as he should be.  “I don’t understand?”

I sighed, lying back on the bed on my back and pulling a blanket on top of me.

“I’d like to, if you don’t mind.”

Then I turned towards the glass partition beyond which Scott lay.

“I owe him.”

And I din’t look back at the Beast anymore. After some serious contemplation (and most likely a telepathic conversation with the Professor), he decided I was being sincere and let me be. But there’s not a doubt in my mind he is studying my every move through the *hidden* cameras right as we speak.

One am. I prop myself up on an elbow and nod off now and again, only to jerk myself awake. Since I committed to watch Scott, that’s exactly what I shall do.

Scott… dressed in clean white sweats, covered up in blankets he’s about to kick off any minute now… looks so young and vulnerable. Twitches as if caught in the throes of a bad nightmare. No points for guessing what that’s about.

I wait for him to simmer down by himself, but he doesn’t. Quietly I slip out of my cabin and go into his. I’m aware of digital eyes watching me, but I don’t care. Morphing into Jean is easy, she was pretty much my build, only taller. I choose a white flowing lingerie nightgown to garb my new self with, the kind I’d always imagined upstate women like Dr. Grey would go for.

Do I know what I’m doing?

Not really. I just know Scott needs someone to settle him down. And Jean Grey is the only woman who can do that.

“Shh… it's okay, it's okay.”

I stroke his forehead with soft fingers, sitting beside his bed… holding his cold sweaty hand in mine. And he continues to tremble. My voice… Jean’s voice… soft and soothing. I feign the sexy Stanford-ly accent I know she had, using generic endearments I’m guessing she *must* have used.

“Scott… its alright. I’m here sweetheart, I’m right here, beside you.”

Ever so slowly… the red glow behind his wraparound glasses brightens as he opens his eyes. He’s delirious, not sure if he knows himself to be awake or not. He looks at me, frowns… but doesn’t seem as shocked as I’d expected. Tries to get up but I push him back.

“Take it easy hon…”

He winces. “Jean?”

I close my eyes, but only for a second. Deception comes easy to me, why should this be any different?

“Yes, its me darling. Go to sleep.”

He closes his eyes, head falling back on the pillow in sheer relief.

“Thought you wouldn’t come tonight.”

I frown, not sure what to say. He looks at me again, smiles. Grips my hand in his tightly.

“I miss you so much Jean.”

He breathes heavily, jerking his head now and then as if to ward off much-needed sleep. I hold his head in both my hands, trying to calm him back to sleep.

“I know sweetheart, but I’m here now. Everything’s gonna be okay. I need you to go back to sleep alright?”

He winces in pain, turning to press his face into my hand. “Can't. Nightmares. I keep running to you… but I can't… can't outrun the water… all that fucking water.”

Dear God.

“And it's so cold. Are you cold Jean? You’re not cold are you?”

I grip his hand tighter as he rambles on, stroke his hair, his swollen jaw. “No I’m not sweetheart. I’m fine. Its… not so bad. Shh… settle down now.”

He shakes his head, in agony, in frustration. “Stay with me Jean. Please… don’t leave me.”

I look up at the cameras once, then back at Scott. I leave the chair behind, and get into the bed that’s barely enough for two. Pull the blankets up over the both of us so he can't kick them away. Cover him up and hold him to myself, cautious not to disturb his injuries.

“Alright sweetie, I’m right here. See? Right here with you.”

Scott squints his eyes open and sees me beside him. Smiles gratefully.

“Thank you.”

“Shh… I need you to sleep now all right?”

Meekly he nods. I put an arm across his neck and press my forehead against his. Scott drifts back to sleep in moments.

*** END ***


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You write great XMen slash; it would be great to read a less angst sequel of this:)

Oh thanks so much! :) Sequel? Hmm.. was meant to be a one-shot really. Its indicative that Raven will continue to give Logan a Scott-fix now and then from this point on.. could I write a new twist into it? Dunno.
But I am working on a new Logan/Scott slash piece. Should have it up soon, I think :p Thanks for reviewing again hon, means a lot me.

You writing a new fic??? Awwww!!! That makes me so happy with the third movie coming up soon and all...BTW did you watch the teaser trailer???

That scene with angst Scott screaming and taking his optics off at the cliff and Logan catching them was so...OMG. Slash.
Can´t wait to see that on big screen!!!

Oh and once your story is read where can I find it??/

Oh umm yeahh.. see ever since I told you about it I havent had the time to even log on and read, let alone write! :) Its a well known jinx isnt it? Read it somewhere.. anyway. I'm not giving up thats for sure :)

I saw the trailers yeah, kinda disappointed because there was so little of Scott in there.. I bet the movie wont have much of him either :( But yeah that is an extremely suggestive slashy moment, yummy.

I'll post here love when its done.. and I'll let you know :D

NO!!

Angst + hotsex= goodness!

Thanks so much! :) Raven's nothing if not completely self-actualized lol. A very interesting character to write.

Great story! Very hot too. And your Mystique is really good.

I enjoyed it very much! :-)

Thanks very much!! Feedback first thing in the morning.. you've made my day hon :)

Very, very intriguing. I love the genderfuck and mindfuck of Logan knowing that Scott is Raven and deciding not to care. I love it. I love the double-punch of a Scott who acts like a flirtatious woman because he is one and because it is the kind of come-on that makes Logan crazy -- tough little Scott needing him so badly.

I like Raven's own brand of caring here. Including looking into the camera to say, "fuck you, I know you're watching. I'm gonna do it anyway."

If you can't get a beta, please use your spell check!

Oh this was both heartbreaking and sensual.
Nicely done.

*blushes* Thanks very much! :)

cool

(Anonymous)
I'm not a fan of any type of slash, but you wrote this very well and it worked. Great job!!

Thanks hon! :) I'm guessing its the ambiguity of gender (Raven/Scott) that turns off some hardcore slash as well as hardcore het fans lol. You've got to be open-minded to read and enjoy this. And I'm very glad you did.. cheers again :)

that was really nice. though i'm agreein with the others a squeal would be nice... hint! hint!. anyway thanks for sharing. keep up the good work.

Thanks again hon, for reading and for the lovely feedback :) Sequel? ummm... maybe :P

How amazing! I read this on aff.net and I planned to leave a review, but I got side tracked packing. This was a very nice read. I love being inside Logan's head. The bittersweet ending was also very lovely. Thanks for sharing.

Hey there.. thank you for reviewing! I usually end up writing angsty climaxes dunno why. I'm happy you liked :)
p.s. you got jason behr on your LJ!! My GAWD he looks hottt.

I can't to read more of your stuff. *bows*
you got jason behr on your LJ!! My GAWD he looks hottt
Thanks!

I've always liked Mystique. She's smart & deadly, completely unapologetic for being what & who she is. I like her refusal to wear a false shape unless it's for a "mission", too; she won't assimilate.

The contrast between Logan's feral need of Scott & then the tenderness with Scott & Jean is interesting...makes me wonder what would happen if Logan really *did* go claim him. Scott's so wounded right now, who knows?

Though it's going to be awkward for Logan after this, I'd think-he *knows* what Scott could be like for him, maybe...he knows what the man's body & his eyes look like now. I'm thinking of inconvenient flashbacks during meetings. *laughs*

I thought Mystique's teasing Hank was cute, too. Of course she'd find him attractive, a "gentleman", not a Beast.





Pesti

Dude thank you so much for wandering over to this one! :) I ended up reading it myself haha.
Yeah Mystique I love.. and unlike Halle Berry, Rebecca Romjin was absolutely the perfect casting for the part. Her very complex plot and history in the books is even more intriguing. I forget.. is she Rogue's mother or not?? :D:D

Anyway, this was just a one shot hon, ended not so well 'cause... well, Scott's still straight and not looking to hook up with Logan in this one like, at all :( But you're right.. a lot of inconvenient flashbacks will be had at the end of this haha :D I just like to think Raven will keep seeing Logan and give him his Scott!fix whenever he feels like it.

I thought Mystique's teasing Hank was cute, too. Of course she'd find him attractive, a "gentleman", not a Beast.
Haha. Thanks hon. Doctor McCoy really is charming and yet naive in his own way isn't he?

cheers hon :)

When Rogue's power manifested in her early teens, her dad threw her out; she didn't have a mother. Mystique found her at the bus station, crying and lost, starving...she took her in *before* she knew what her power was. I think that's important to know. Mystique was the only mother Rogue ever had & they really did love each other; but Mystique *also* knew how useful Rogue's powers could be. She took her on a mission to steal this superjet, which was really a setup against one of her worst "good guy" enemies, Carol Danvers...crap, I forget her code name right at the moment. *scowls* Ms Marvel? Think so. Anyway, she could fly & had superstrength, but when young Rogue, about...hm, 14-15 from the look of her in the cartoon, latched onto her, she drained her strength & made her weak. This was *before* Rogue knew what would happen if she held on too long, you see. Mystique had made her play with her powers, touching her allies & using their powers temporarily, like she did with Pyro & Iceman in X2. Well, Mystique suspected what would happen if Rogue held on long enough & she was right...Ms Marvel ended up in a coma; Rogue ended up with the superstrength & flying ability and an angry Carol in her head. She was going crazy & ran away, feeling betrayed by her "momma" & Xavier found her then. He & Jean help block the absorbed memories from her mind.

Sad thing is, she & Mystique still love each other. They *were* family, for a few years; and Mystique has fought hard to get her daughter back; Rogue said "You're not my momma any more" but she was sobbing when she said it....*cries*


Mystique & Sabretooth are, I believe, the biological parents of Nightcrawler & that asshole Senator guy, which is why he's so freaky against mutants; how such a pair produced the very sweet & playful Kurt is beyond me!


Yeah, once you start dealving into the twisted, intertwined back stories of canon relationships, not to mention all the different comic versions of same, it can get a little crazy. But you can see how rich and painful the whole kidnapping Rogue/using her as a battery plot could have been made in XMen1, I think...but they didn't even acknowledge it. Not even a ..."I know you but Xavier made you forget me" kind of nod. *sighs*

I also like how Mystique appreciates all the guys in their ways...she just likes the menfolks. *laughs* No shame to that!


And normally, I'm all about the Logan/Scott action; but in this, it's kind of fascinating to see the unrequitedness (if it's not a word, I'm making it one! *grins*) What *would* Scott do if he found out how Logan felt, that Mystique was pretending to be him while they had sex? I don't think he'd be phobic about it, but even so-it would be uncomfortable to be around each other. But...there would still be the comfort of being cared for, wouldn't there? A sort of appreciation that "even if I don't feel the same way about him, it's...nice to be loved and wanted" & an honesty between them that they wouldn't necessarily be able to have with anyone else. *muses* The right kind of person could feel that way. Of course, he could also be an ass about it. *grins* But I don't think so.

Scott's damage is particularly hard because he & Jean *did* have that telepathic link. For someone who has to exert such terrible self-control all the time *and* who can't show his emotions via his eyes/face like most people, having someone who *knows* what he thinks and feels without having to speak and then losing that person...must be like being crippled. I think Logan's long life experience, which gives him the ability to read people shrewdly, & his feral senses can, to some extent, act in the same way as Jean's telepathy. Hmm, without being as invasive? Allowing Scott *some* privacy?


Damn, see what you started. My mind's all a-whirl! *laughs* And I'm betting you won't be writing any sequels to this, so I'll be left unfed.

Hinting? Who's hinting? *toes ground*





Pesti



Thanks for the 101 :) I did know bits and parts of this storyline but not completely. If the original fans of Xmen had complaints against the first movie I didn't understand because the movie was frankly my first exposure to the genre. I started reading and watching the shows as a result of liking the movie enough to explore more.

What *would* Scott do if he found out how Logan felt, that Mystique was pretending to be him while they had sex?
You've discussed both possibilities. I personally like to think he'll be really psyched out though. Scott doesn't handle attention well and especially of the amorous kind! I think Logan might have a better time with it than Scott :D 'cause my boy would blush and fumble every time he'd cross paths with his admirer while Logan would just love to see him fidget haha!

I think Logan's long life experience, which gives him the ability to read people shrewdly, & his feral senses can, to some extent, act in the same way as Jean's telepathy. Hmm, without being as invasive? Allowing Scott *some* privacy?
Absolutely! See why Logan is the better choice than Jean!! :D I can understand how Scott is so attracted to or dependent on telepaths. Emma Frost is another example. But it can't possibly be a healthy thing. Did I just say Logan was the healthier choice? LOLOL! Oh yeah, sure :D

Damn, see what you started. My mind's all a-whirl! *laughs* And I'm betting you won't be writing any sequels to this, so I'll be left unfed.
Awww sweetheart! Don't you think I have enough WIPs going already? :) Please let me claim to have completed a couple of stories, this being one of them haha :D

cheers hon :)

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing hon :)

I'm incredibly late, but wow... this piece was written beautifully. I was thinking if you were going to write the 'love scene' (oh yes, it was love alright.) in Logan's POV or not... so glad you did hahaha... Mystique is another fav of mine. But I love Cyke and Wolvie more :]

Thank you for sharing your wonderful writing.

Its never too late to read I say! Thank you so much again for your lovely feedback. Cyke and Wolvie are adorable together aren't they? :)

cheers hon.

I agree whole heartedly! Hahaha. As much as I love Scott Summers [...or James Marsden for that matter 9_9] I just can't help but love him /more/ with Wolverine. [... or Hugh Jackman for that matter, hahaha. Pseudo RPS? :P]

And no problem on the feedback. :] You deserve every comment you get [and most likely more!]

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